Notes to self--
--when you leave for work in the morning, doofus, please remember to place all, ahem, 'adult toys' farther into their hiding spot underneath the bed. If you don't, the landlord will, no doubt, call and say that they're showing your apartment in a few minutes.
It's not so much that they'll think you have, you know, a decent sex life, or even one at all--hey, high five!--but the landlord and the potential new resident, a resident that you'll have to see from time-to-time who is probably also a gay dude on the prowl, will think that it's yours. Do you really want that?
--nice, new birthday flips flops(with bottle openers!) are just as likely get peed on from the guy with stream direction issues at the adjacent urinal as are the cheap Target flip-flops. Make a concerted effort to master one leg peeing.
--when you leave for work in the morning, doofus, please remember to place all, ahem, 'adult toys' farther into their hiding spot underneath the bed. If you don't, the landlord will, no doubt, call and say that they're showing your apartment in a few minutes.
It's not so much that they'll think you have, you know, a decent sex life, or even one at all--hey, high five!--but the landlord and the potential new resident, a resident that you'll have to see from time-to-time who is probably also a gay dude on the prowl, will think that it's yours. Do you really want that?
--nice, new birthday flips flops(with bottle openers!) are just as likely get peed on from the guy with stream direction issues at the adjacent urinal as are the cheap Target flip-flops. Make a concerted effort to master one leg peeing.
posted by Irritable Male Syndrome @ 1:30 PM
3 Comments:
I was at the old lady's place this weekend when her dad and step mom came by. I quickly made an excuse to rush into the bedroom ("to let her know that you're here cause she may still be in the shower.") and hustled all the lotions and wrappers underneath some clothes.
Not that I mind people seeing I use Magnums...
We found porn at my grandpa's place after he died, which makes me fearfull of what they will find at my place should I meet and untimely death. Thankfully and mercifully, however, I will be already be dead. (oh PLEASE let my parents die first!)
Oh, grandpa; he so horny.
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